Category: Uncategorized
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Lately, I’ve been experiencing panic attacks. It’s hard to even put into words what they feel like, but I’ll try because maybe someone else out there is going through the same thing and feels as alone as I do. For me, it starts with a tightness in my chest, like someone is pressing down and…
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This week has broken me in ways I didn’t expect. I’ve let all the stress build up and it’s finally showing in my body. The panic attacks have started, one even happening in front of my doctor. She signed me off work because I’m no longer functioning — and that scares me. I keep telling…
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When grief and control weigh you down in more ways than one I don’t recognise myself anymore. I used to be fit, healthy, the kind of person who loved being out and about. Now I look in the mirror and feel disgusting. I avoid meeting people sometimes because I can’t bear the thought of them…
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This weekend reminded me just how exhausting it is to live in this cycle. I had a family party on Saturday, a big, special celebration. In the days leading up to it, I almost didn’t want to go. I hate the way I look at the minute. I’ve put on so much weight, I feel…
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This week has left me drained in a way I can’t fully explain. Living in this cycle is like being on a ride that never stops — begging, threats, silence, then sudden “love.” Over and over again. On Wednesday, he begged me for forgiveness. He promised me things he’s never done before — said he…
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People think the hardest part of leaving is making the decision. But the truth is, the hardest part is sticking to it. It’s the constant repeating: “No, it’s over.” It’s the exhaustion of having the same conversation again and again with someone who refuses to hear you. It’s waking up drained because you know he…
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For years, I told myself “he never hit me, so maybe it’s not really abuse.” But abuse isn’t always about bruises. Abuse takes many forms — and I have lived through more than one. 💔 Verbal Abuse Being called useless, stupid, brain dead, a waste of space — over and over until you start to…
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For as long as I can remember, I have walked on eggshells, always trying to avoid setting him off. I would rush home before he arrived so dinner would be ready, because he liked to eat at the same time every night. I would quickly clean up the kids’ toys, trying to make everything perfect.…
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No one understands me. Some days, I don’t even understand myself. Does anyone else ever feel like that? I filed for divorce because I realised this isn’t a normal relationship. But he laughs at me, tells me I’m overreacting, insists he doesn’t control me. He begs for another chance, and every time he does, my…
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Last night I woke from a nightmare that he hurt me. I couldn’t sleep. I lay in bed, afraid to even go to the bathroom in case he realised I was awake and came into my room. I could hear that he was awake too, and my mind wouldn’t stop racing. I keep asking myself:…
The Fear Ends Here 